Being the star of the world’s most viral runaway bride video wasn’t how I envisioned my future when I woke up on my wedding morning, but here we are. With me hiding from the world in Fiji where I’m now honeymooning solo. And where I just tripped over my number one celebrity crush, hungover and sleeping on my little porch.

Turns out Jonas Rutherford, Razzle Dazzle movie star and heir to the entertainment conglomerate’s billions, is having his own relationship issues and is here hiding too after details of his scandalous divorce went public. I didn’t think inviting him in for a hangover cure would lead to us getting friendly. And friendlier.

And then—okay, yes. I slept with him. Who can blame a girl? When you’re suddenly unexpectedly single and the number one guy on your freebie list is available, you leap.

But when I wake up the next morning, I discover I’m not the only runaway in my life, because he’s just ghosted me. It’s fine. I’m fine.

Neither one of us is in a position to start an actual relationship. But three years later? When he crashes my brother’s wedding? Where the son that he’s just discovered he has is serving as ring bearer? Life was a lot easier when I was just a runaway bride.